365 Project: Day 124

There are so many things about people and life and this world that I don't understand. I try so hard. 

Some days it just exhausts me. 

365 Project: Day 119

Tuckered. There is no better word for how I'm feeling right now. Its been a long day. I just want to melt into my bed right now.

365 Project: Day 114

I'm feeling a little less stressed, a little more motivated, and a lot more organized today. I think the beautiful, warm sunshine is making me feel a lot better. The constant desert wind in the Spring just makes everything feel so chaotic. 

The past few weeks have been overwhelming. My mile long to do list has suddenly taken over my life. It seems like as I slowly cross things off, more and more and more just keeps piling on. As a result I'm not only keeping one calendar with my schedule, but two, just to keep track of everything. One in my purse and one in my phone. I have a ringer alert for every single thing that must get done. My life has been planned out hour by hour for the last month. Its exhausting. 

Its hard for me not to take on the world. I'd like to believe that I can do anything. And I can. I may develop severe headaches, and eye twitches in the process, but I am capable of anything. That sounds really healthy, I'm sure. (Please note the sarcasm and eye rolling here.) 

I have this constant compulsion to work and create and just keep pushing and pushing and pushing myself until I just can't go on. I'm not sure where it comes from, but I can't seem to stop it. If I'm not working on something, then I'm thinking about what I "should" be working on. I'm obsessed. I will work myself to exhaustion at the expense of my health, my sanity, my relationships, and my personal life. There is a certain satisfaction I feel when things are getting accomplished. Yes, I realize that this is problem. No, I don't think it will ever change. 

365 Project: Day 47

I'm exhausted. I had to lay down and close my eyes for a second. I needed to rest, even if I had to take my picture while doing so. November was a tough month full of travel, events, and loss. Now that I'm finally home, I have spent every second parked in front of my computer working away. But I'm making progress and getting a little closer to catching up. As of right now I am up to date on my 365 Project. That's one thing I can mark off my to do list.

I think this is the first picture I have taken wearing my glasses. Yes, I wear glasses. Not every day. My eye sight really isn't that bad. Although I should probably wear them more often than I do. I only wear them when my eyes feel tired from staring at the computer all day, to read something far away, or to drive at night. But I like them. I feel like they make me look more studious.

The world definitely looks much more clear through them. Everything seems so crisp and well defined. Even colors seem brighter. My vision completely changes just by putting on my glasses. I wish they made glasses that could make you see other things more clearly. Like, choices, or plans, goals, paths, the next step, or people's intentions. I would wear those glasses every day for sure.